Thursday, December 10, 2015

A Torah Trifecta

Three (3) Sifrei Torah! Abq Jew must tell you that this Shabbat, Shabbat Miketz, is not an ordinary, run-of-the-mill Shabbat, For not only is it Shabbat Miketz - it is also Rosh Hodesh Tevet, and it is also Shabbat Hanukkah. Which means -


Three (3)! Yes, three (3)! How often, Abq Jew hears you ask, do we read from three (3) Sifrei Torah? Oddly enough (not really), Chabad.org has the answer.
Every year on the holiday of Simchat Torah, three different portions of the Torah are read during the morning service. a) V'zot Haberacha, the last portion of the Torah; b) the holiday maftir reading, discussing the day's Temple service; c) Bereishit, the first portion of the Torah.  
If a synagogue has three Torah scrolls, then each of these portions is read from another scroll. If not, then one of the scrolls is quickly rolled from one portion to the next between readings. 
There are three other times during the course of a year when, if various calendric variables fall in place, three portions of the Torah are read on the same day: 
1. When Rosh Chodesh Tevet is on Shabbat. Since the month of Tevet always begins during the holiday of Chanukah, in such a case there would be three readings: a) The weekly reading. b) The reading for Rosh Chodesh (head of the month). c) The holiday reading. 
2. When the month of Adar (or the second month of Adar in a leap year) begins on Shabbat. The extra portion of Shekalim is always read on the Shabbat immediately preceding the month of Adar, or on Rosh Chodesh Adar itself when it falls on Shabbat. On such a week we would read: a) The weekly Torah portion. b) The reading for Rosh Chodesh. c) The Shekalim reading. 
3. Same thing when the month of Nissan begins on Shabbat. The extra portion of Hachodesh is read on the Shabbat immediately preceding the month of Nissan, or on Rosh Chodesh Nissan when it falls on Shabbat. On such a Shabbat, the weekly Torah portion is read, in addition to the Rosh Chodesh and Hachodesh readings. 
In any of these cases, three Torah scrolls are taken out of the Ark, if the synagogue has that many.
But what happens if the synagogue doesn't have that many Torah scrolls? Then the congregation gets to meet

Tircha D. Tzibura

Tircha D. Tzibura is known throughout the Jewish world, even (especially?) Abq. Some say she has always been here; others, that she just arrived from the Coast. With her flaming red curls, sensible shoes, and half-asleep expression, she is easy to spot.

OK ....  Tircha d'tzibura ("a burden on the congregation") is a Rabbinic / Talmudic expression that denotes an activity that takes longer than most people can bear, and that, therefore, should be avoided. While some claim that tircha d'tzibura cannot apply to shul on Shabbas - after all, where else ya gonna go? what else ya gotta do? - others are sure that it does.

The classic example: the many occasions during the year when we take two (or three!) Sifrei Torah (Torah scrolls) from the Ark, so we don't keep the congregation waiting while we roll the scroll back and forth to find the next reading.

Abq Jew must point out that the correct phrase is
"Sifrei Torah," and not the often-heard "Torahs." 
There is only one Torah.


Did you notice that, with all the talk of three (3) and threes, Abq Jew never used the term trinity? You're welcome! But since we are talking about trifectas, let's bring in the three-part Fugue for Tinhorns from Guys and Dolls (Abq Jew's favorite musical)!


Shabbat Shalom!
Happy Rosh Hodesh!
Cheery Chanukah!

Sunday, December 6, 2015

More Hanukkah Music


All Hanukkah Music All The Time



The Fountainheads



Mama Doni



Peter, Paul & Mary



Sharon Jones & The Dap Kings



Julie Silver



The Klezmatics



Tom Lehrer
https://youtu.be/LslsgH3-UFU



SoulAviv
https://youtu.be/RSjJu1ZYKIw



Mickey Katz



Alisa Fineman



The Klezmer Nutcracker



Thursday, December 3, 2015

Welcome to the Big Tent

Fifth Night Hanukkah: It has only been a month since Abq Jew shared something from Andrew Silow-Carroll, Editor-in-Chief of the New Jersey Jewish News (see Davening With Laughter).

But it was a couple of years before that (see Laughing at PewLaughing at Pew 2; and Jewish Jokes for Dark Days), and Abq Jew is trying to make up for it.


In a recent article, Andrew (it's easier than Mr Silow-Carroll, and anyway he's younger than Abq Jew) introduced us to Big Tent Judaism, formerly known as the Jewish Outreach Institute.
Are you ready for the Big Tent? I mean, really ready? 
Last month saw the launch of Big Tent Judaism, a rebranding of the former Jewish Outreach Institute, an organization dedicated to making Jewish institutions welcoming for the unaffiliated, under-affiliated, Hebrew-curious, and just plain alienated. For much of JOI’s early life, the focus was on interfaith families; JOI deserves credit for goading synagogues and organizations into extending a welcome mat to the intermarried. 
The new name reflects the idea that “outreach” does not just pertain to the intermarried, but to anyone who doesn’t feel welcomed by the Jewish mainstream. The BTJ web site also refers to Jews-by-choice, unaffiliated and unengaged Jews, Jews with disabilities, and Jews from diverse ethnic and racial backgrounds. Those who sign up for the “Big Tent Judaism Coalition” pledge to, among others things, welcome all newcomers, offer free and low-cast “samples” of their services, and in general “lower barriers to participation.” 
“There has to be a place for everyone in the community, including those with whom I may not agree, but I am prepared to defend their right to be there,” Kerry Olitzky, the New Brunswick rabbi who heads BTJ, told our reporter this week.
<Read more
Abq Jew is happy to announce that

Congregation Albert is ready

for Big Tent Judaism and will therefore and forthwith provide a Fifth Night program for the entire Albuquerque Jewish community.


Fifth Night is a fun and simple way for children to participate in tzedakah (charity) by giving one night of Hanukkah gifts to another child in need.

Coming together to celebrate and donate helps our children learn how their giving impacts others, and makes the holiday even more meaningful. Together, we are also able to make a more significant contribution to a charity in need.

This year’s Fifth Night at Congregation Albert is especially planned for young children and their families. We are asking for donations of new, unwrapped toys for children up to age 17 and new or gently used coats in all sizes, that will be given to help children and families in need.

Hosted by Congregation Albert, this child-focused program will include music, a holiday craft, Hanukkah candle lighting, gift donation, light dessert, and fun!

Click here to register. Not in Abq? Click here.

Abq Jew would like to point out that Big Tent Judaism and Fifth Night are
  • Non-denominational
  • Trans-denominational
  • Post-denominational
You know - it's for Jews and those who love 'em.



Put on your yarmulke!
It's time to celebrate Chanukah!

Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Chanukah Approaches! Got Latkes?

Try This Maccabeats Recipe! The ideal temperature to fry a latke is between 360 and 375 degrees F. The best way to monitor the temperature is to use a deep fry or candy thermometer. If you don’t have one of those, here are two simple methods to test the oil’s temperature:
  1. Drop a small piece of bread into the oil. If it takes 60 seconds to brown, the oil temperature is perfect for frying.
  2. Place a kernel of unpopped popcorn into the oil. When the kernel pops, the oil is hot enough to fry.

The above instructions come from Tori Avey's gloriously illustrated (DO NOT read on an empty stomach) and delightfully helpful article (recipe included), How To Make Crispy Perfect Latkes Every Time.

As everyone in his family can surely and sorely attest, Abq Jew cannot "cook" anything with more ingredients than tuna fish (with mayo) and Cheerios (with banana).

When Abq Jew is alone in the kitchen, open flames are absolutely not allowed; flames emerging from the microwave are strongly discouraged.

It is therefore strictly as a public service that Abq Jew announces

The Albuquerque Best Latke Contest
at the
2015 JCC Hanukkah Festival on December 6

Click here for flyer

Here are the Contest Rules:
  1. Bring a plate of 10 latkes to the JCC Hanukkah Festival on Sunday December 6. 
  2. Label your entry with your name and your latke recipe. 
  3. Latkes will be reheated in an oven prior to judging.
Please note that:
  1. Contestants need to sign up before December 4 at 12:00 Noon.
  2. Latke entries must be submitted by December 6 at 1:00 pm.
Contact Phyllis Wolf for more information or to sign up:

(505) 348-4500 or phyllisw@jccabq.org


And while we're talking Chanukah - let's also talk Maccabeats.


Whose website tells us:
Originally formed in 2007 as Yeshiva University’s student vocal group, the Maccabeats have recently emerged as both Jewish music and a cappella phenomena, with a large fanbase, more than 20 million views on YouTube, numerous TV appearances, and proven success with four albums .... 
Though the Maccabeats aren’t your grandfather’s synagogue choir, their ideology and identity play an important part in what they do. 
Strongly committed to the philosophy of Torah u-Madda, the integration of traditional and secular wisdom, the Maccabeats perform an eclectic array of Jewish, American, and Israeli songs. 

No, the Maccabeats aren’t your grandfather’s synagogue choir. As this Walk The Moon Hanukkah parody certainly illustrates. (You can find the original here.)