As all those who attended shul (even for a short period) on Yom Kippur know, that our inscriptions in the Book of Life are
Signed on Rosh Hashanah. Sealed on Yom Kippur.
For most of us, that's about as far as we need to go. This is what we were taught in Sunday School, and this is what we (fervently or un-) believe. But wait!
What many of us do not realize is that our inscriptions in the Book of Life have not yet been delivered.
And until the FedEx box arrives at the Gates of Heaven - and until the KBH (Holy One, Blessed Be He) signs for it - there is still time to repent.
How much time? Abq Jew hears you ask. Until, the Rabbis say, our inscriptions are
Delivered on Hoshanna Rabba.
More on Hoshanna Rabba later. First, let's take a look at the Top 10 Sins that Albuquerque's eScapegoat collected. (Click here to read them all.)
Top 10 Sins of the Abq Jewish Community
1. I haven't attached shul since I moved to Albuquerque [held over from 5775].
2. I lost my patience with co-workers and acted exasperated when they didn't "get it" fast enough!
3. I have not lived up to my personal commitment to make the world a better place.
4. I didn't communicate better with my family during the past year.
5. Sometimes I enjoy schadenfreude just a bit too much.
A Simple Question; Three Answers: We have just emerged from the solemn holiness of Yom Kippur, only to learn that the great, the incomparable Yogi Berra passed away at age 90 while we were chanting Kol Nidre.
With one Yizkor down and one to go (on Shemini Atzeret, October 5) in this round of fall holidays - plus the description of the death of Moses in this week's parsha, Ha'azinu - perhaps it is a most appropriate time to ask the question
When is it over?
Here are three possible answers to guide us through the remaining, happy, fall holidays.
1. It's Over Before It's Over
Let's start with Roz Chast. Or, more accurately, with Roz Chast's parents, of blessed memory.
Do you know Roz Chast? Here is what Wikipedia says about her.
Rosalind "Roz" Chast (born November 26, 1954) is an American cartoonist and a staff cartoonist for The New Yorker.
She grew up in the Flatbush section of Brooklyn, the only child of an assistant principal and a high school teacher who subscribed to The New Yorker.
Her earliest cartoons were published in Christopher Street and The Village Voice. In 1978 The New Yorker accepted one of her cartoons and has since published more than 800. She also publishes cartoons in Scientific American and the Harvard Business Review.
Abq Jew notes with pleasure that Roz Chast is a graduate of Midwood High School in Brooklyn, Mrs Abq Jew's alma mater.
Roz Chast's most recent book, Can't We Talk About Something More Pleasant?, is a hilarious (to those who have gone through it) memoir of her parents' first days at The Place and last days on Earth.
As The Wheel of Doom illustrates - in Jewish households of a certain era, sometimes it's over even before it's over.
Here is some well-considered advice from Roz Chast on “How to Prepare for Very, Very Advanced Old Age”:
Make sure to scrimp and save every penny of your precious earnings ... And when your scrimpings run out:
Go into your children’s scrimpings, and/or
Play and win the lottery, and/or
Apply for a Guggenheim, and/or
Start smoking, and/or
Take hemlock.
If you read this list and laughed ruefully, chances are you have parents who are living (if that’s what you call it) forever, costing a fortune and driving you insane. If not, you are probably young enough to have parents who are white-water rafting, eating Greek yogurt and driving you insane.
Never fear. Your day will come.
2. It's Over When It's Over
Based upon Yogi's famous saying (which he probably actually said, referring to the 1973 pennant race):
It ain't over till it's over.
This is, Abq Jew believes, the mainstream, middle-of-the-road position, about which it's hard to argue.
3. It's Never Over
But we are Jews, so - even though it's hard - let's argue.
And let's start with Abq Jew's early (2010!), prescient, and now famous blog post, Torah and Talmud and Zombies. In which Abq Jew stated:
When it comes to the afterlife, Judaism (among many religions) found itself in a theological and theodical box: If we believe that God is just, how do we account for evil in the world? And how do we account for the misfortune of the righteous and the prosperity of the wicked (tzaddik vi'ra lo, rasha vi'tov lo)?
It is clear to Abq Jew and most disinterested observers that there ain't much justice in this world, so it must be that God's justice is delivered somewhere else - in Olam Ha'ba, the World to Come.
But how does the World to Come actually work? Well, you've got two ideas that compete with each other (in the sense that you only need one of them to answer the question):
Resurrection of the Body. This is the high octane form of the afterlife. Yes, God has the power to lift us up from the dead, and to enable us to . . . well, exactly what is hard to say.
Immortality of the Soul. This is the unleaded afterlife. Since we have no need for our physical components, they are jettisoned . . . well, exactly when is hard to say.
On a more practical level, we Albuquerque Jews have institutions and organizations and, most importantly, the Chevre Kaddisha of Greater Albuquerque, to help us approach things with a tiny modicum of sanguinity.
Important: The Chevre Kaddisha is looking for new members! Please contactAbq Jew!
But to be more practical, we need to talk about ... "things."
Gail Rubin, The Doyenne of Death ® (based right here in Albuquerque!) has often said
Just as talking about sex won’t make you pregnant,
talking about funerals won’t make you dead.
Here is an ELI Talk by Dr Michael Slater (President of the Board of Kavod v'Nichum (Honor and Comfort), a non-profit educational and advocacy organization on end of life issues) that tests this theory.
Living Jewishly Means Dying Jewishly, Too.
In much of society today, death is to be avoided at all costs - in polite company and modern medicine alike. Jewish tradition, explains Dr. Michael Slater, has a very different approach.
In a talk that is part memoir, part history, part communal call-to-action, we see the wisdom of Judaism as not only life-affirming, but death-affirming, as well.
Chabad Inspiration: Among the many inspiring messages on the Internet these past few Days of Awe, this one in particular caught Abq Jew's attention.
From Chabad.org's Daily Dose of Jewish Wisdom, based on letters and talks of the Rebbe, Rabbi M. M. Schneerson.
You came on stage with a script in your hand. The script tells of you, the hero of the story, bringing light into places of darkness, repairing that which is broken, healing that which has fallen ill, creating beauty from scattered fragments of everyday life.
Your soul is tied to that script. Without it, you have no reason to be here. For you were conceived within that context, born to fill that role.
And should you fail to perform according to script, what then?
Then you must write your own script, one that can heal even that which you yourself have broken.
And your Creator who conceived you and conceived this entire plan, what will He think of this new script you have composed?
He will laugh in delight, exclaiming, “Look at my child! She has written her own script!”
